Maybe I didn’t have the wedding of the century.
Maybe you weren’t there to walk me down the aisle.
Maybe you weren’t there to see my first child born…or then the next.
Maybe you weren’t there for graduation.
Maybe you weren’t there for prom.
Maybe you weren’t there for my first fall or my first job.
Maybe you weren’t there for it all.
Maybe none of that ever matters, just as long as I am here for you now.
I battled with the thought to come here. For a major life turning procedure. It is so hard to turn the tables of a schedule. Yet waking up I could feel something so unsettling in me and I wasn’t sure what that was. So here I am now, moved heaven and earth’s schedule to be a part of this moment. Because it mattered. It mattered that much. I know I did the right thing.
I could hear your loud voice. Asking someone where Registration was. When you walked in the room, your eyes scanned the unfamiliar, the familiar and then your eyes saw me. I know you are strong, yet scared. I know you are tough yet weak. I know that you are here and I am there. But the moment your eyes saw me…you noted, “Daddy’s little girl.” The tears stung your already bloodshot red eyes. You moved away from the registration desk and walked fast to greet me. “How’d you do it! I can’t believe you are here!” A smile worth millions is something you could never replace. You were quickly comforted in a moment of uneasy despair. You cried. That moment became monumental.
So despite all the maybe’s, nothing else is as important as our present – for that is what we can impact. That is what we can CREATE! That is what we can change! For all the rest is canceled out in the moment of our present… I am still daddy’s little girl. I am important. I do matter in your life. Being here makes the difference. Even though I have my mom, I also have my dad. It took the two of you to make me. I love you both individually. The past matters NOT. I am here today supporting you both because you are the only parents God gave me.
Don’t be mad. Don’t be jealous. Love goes a long way. It is the strongest force that moves the world – the force that is our God. God is love. And He has given it to us to extend to others. I am thankful. You did a great job. You did your best. You showed me how to keep the faith and keep it through it all. Every time I am near you – that’s what counts the most. You give me all the love I need that makes up for past. I am here. I am not going away. I am not full of regrets.
This is the Message I’ve been set apart to proclaim as preacher, emissary, and teacher. It’s also the cause of all this trouble I’m in. But I have no regrets. I couldn’t be more sure of my ground—the One I’ve trusted in can take care of what He’s trusted me to do right to the end.
~2 Timothy 1:11-12 (MSG)
I am with my dad now…sitting by the bedside as he just had two major surgeries back to back. He is in recovery. This is my sole purpose in life. He has entrusted us to do things right until the end. This is the right thing. To support each other and be there positively in each other’s lives. To make things better and put an effort to do what is good and wholesome. This is wholesome for me now. I miss my family at home, but I am really appreciating the time here with my dad for this recovery and time with my other immediate family. We are catching up. Lots of hugs, laughter, and sharing.
My dad is a trooper. Despite all the pain and discomfort, he is really trying to pull through bravely. He sleeps, he snores, he wakes and yells about the pain. But the worst part is over. The first part to do something necessary has taken place and it was NOT easy. It had to be done. We all need to go through times that are trying so that we can have a healthy and better life.
Daddy –I know you appreciate me here.
Father…my Lord –I know you appreciate me here too.
I am Daddy’s little girl…here to support and do what is right until the end with the best of my ability that You have given me.
I hope I made you proud.
I love you!
September 2nd, 2015 at 8:30 pm
I am feeling blessed sitting here in the hospital here in Ohio. I have my mom sleeping next to me in room. Watching my tio sleeping in front of me. And my favorite cousin sitting here quietly typing. This is what you were typing. I cry because your words strike a cord in my heart and soul. I feel every word of this because I understand and see it. Your strength and courage never fails to amaze me. As a woman, friend, mother, sister, daughter and my cousin. I love you.
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September 2nd, 2015 at 9:18 pm
Wow words can never express how I feel now.❤ my beautiful niece and fellow woman of God a pastor once said to me when i asked about all the mistake I made he said CANCELLED when you accepted Christ as your saviour .he forgives it all . I said how can I be a better Christian he said when in doubt ask what would God do. This is exactly what you have done. Remember family first honor thy parents.so proud of you.😚 love you infinity 👭 so happy you are there. Love always Tity
September 3rd, 2015 at 1:53 am
Amazing!! You make me proud!! Love you so!! Praying for God’s healing… 😘
September 3rd, 2015 at 3:14 am
As I sit here and read this and brought me to tears wow Christina you are one strong women of God beautiful person inside and out..God Bless Your dad, and family..Know that my Prayers are with you..Praying for healing upon your father our God is a God of miracles Thank the lord that the operations went well.
December 31st, 2015 at 5:23 am
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