Sometimes we may not always be able to articulate what is going through a cluttered mind. You just don’t realize how fierce the battle is. It is so violent, so heavy and it floods you until you become completely overwhelmed. You start to sink into the mire.
I thank God that there are so many heroes in the bible that had to have their own personal horror stories on BLAST FOR LIFE! Like–even past his death we are still speaking of the ups and downs of a KING named David. A leader! A guide! A pioneer of faith.
How many times do we recall how flawed the great Apostle Peter was during his own training days beside the King of all kings. Talk about having the best training ever and still mess up horribly.
Apostle Paul ran churches in every season yet is remembered for his violent temper before and after his days of Christianity.
They are flawed.
Like pretty bad.
I can find myself in a state of distress just like David was before becoming king. To top it all off God sent him 400 more stressed out men to complicate the matter– “NOW LEAD THAT WAY!” I’m gonna start you up right here! Right in the cave of darkness.
Even in trying to saturate my mind with the Word of God–the flaws just become so obvious when you are next to the rest. But maybe–just maybe–if we look upon all these written mishaps we will understand just how much they are flawed as you. We are all flawed.
So–God sent His flawless Son to cover all those flaws FOREVER!!!
Every time I want to get better at a thing it looks like I become worse at the thing!
I’m gonna be a better wife! A better mom! A better friend! A better pastor! A better workout routine…all these betters and it actually becomes worse.
LORD HELP! Just help! Because all of this can be so aggravating to the soul.
What do I do?
Just start again Chris…. start again. You got another opportunity to try it again. No matter how far you think you have fallen, gone off course (mentally, physically or spiritually) just try it again. The greater the loss–the greater the victory!
I think many times I don’t even know what to do with my complicated self. I often get– “leaving you alone”. It is so scary. BUT GOD! Thank God that He never tells us–I am leaving you alone. Even in the most silent times, His presence is there to carry us right through the storms of life. Through the storms of our mind. Through any warfare. He will never leave us or forsake us.
So I apologize for being overly complicated. It’s not anyone’s job to fix that. It is my job to recognize that in His Presence I will find the fullness of JOY. I will come up for air and be able to breathe again after my energy is spent laboring away in a bed of anguish.
“Perhaps our eyes need to be washed by our tears once in a while,
so that we can see life with a clearer view again.”
Find comfort in His Word, when you go through times like this. He says he will cover you in the wilderness. He will clothe you in the valley. So when I find even my own mind a wilderness and a valley –He is going to cover me and bring me to a place where I will rejoice on every side of the madness that is within.
You crown the year with Your goodness,
And Your paths drip with abundance.
They drop on the pastures of the wilderness,
And the little hills rejoice on every side.
The pastures are clothed with flocks;
The valleys also are covered with grain;
They shout for joy, they also sing.